education – Teach Them Right

TTR Analysis: The Kerner Report Viewed Through the Paradigm of the Nine Areas of Human Activity

Published on December 16, 2019 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

TTR Analysis of the Kerner Report in the Nine Areas of Human Activity by 15 year old Joshua.

His homeschooling assignment was to analyze the Kerner Report in the Nine Areas of Human Activity, which as readers know, is the main paradigm of my entire curriculum. So much more can be said about this interesting report put together at the end of the so-called Civil Rights Era, and I plan to do just that, with a narrated version.

Did you ever learn about the Kerner Report in school or home? The report is not revolutionary in thought in any real way. But what it does show from a macro level, is that the United States has always known its racial problems, and how to solve at least some of them with the Black community. Obviously, they knew what policies would even cause these problems, but more on that in future reports.

In my opinion, the reason why the Kerner Commission Report is interesting is because in my Gen-X lifetime, I’ve seen the “L.A. Riot”, “Ferguson Riot” and “Baltimore Riot”, and each time the nation conducts roundtables, reconciliation prayer meetings and worst of all, media reports/discussions all asking, “How can something like this happen and what can be done to make sure it doesn’t happen again?”

The Kerner Commission explored why these uprisings happened in the 1960s and how to prevent more uprisings in the nation’s cities in the future. It is striking to see my son answer the question, “Was the report effective?” His response, and the statistics he discovered, indicate that he believes he will see many more uprisings in his lifetime as well.

In these upcoming years, hopefully he will not be a whiny voice exclaiming, “Why?”, or “How could this happen?” Instead, he will be able to offer solutions to those who really desire to change and stay on code towards the real solution to our country’s “race problems”.

Please “Like” and hit “Subscribe” for more homeschooling content, lesson ideas, and TTR Analysis for your own research and learning!

Cool Pappa

Give A Gift That Lasts Generations

Published on November 28, 2019 by Cool Pappa2 Comments

Something to remember as everyone gets ready so spend money and time on gifts for the next month:

TTR Video: The Negro Act of 1740

Published on November 15, 2019 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

My Big Homie, who is 15, put together a slide show presentation from his research on the Negro Act of 1740. Feel free to take this 5 minute trip through history and pass on to others that could use the knowledge.

Stay tuned for more vids from The Tribe, as Daddy-Teacher is quite behind on editing and grading their projects, but “I’m still learning” myself!

Black Veterans: The Epitome of American Patriotism

Published on November 12, 2019November 12, 2019 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

I want to give a big thank you this Veterans Day to every Black man and woman that served in the United States military. It is ironic that patriotism and racism go together like baseball and hot dogs in the good old USA, as those who scream the loudest saying, “Support our troops!”, often care little about the domestic polices and de facto racism that keeps their “heroes” from living the very American dream that they are told to fight for and export to nations around the world.

The Black soldier lined up to fight the British in 1775, even while they were being enslaved! To add insult to injury, many of the Black soldiers fought in the so-called Revolutionary War “in place of their masters, fighting for a freedom they would never see for themselves. (In many cases, their enlistment bonuses or even their pay went straight to their masters.)

At the time of the Civil War, Fredrick Douglass argued that the Black soldier could help the North win the war, but Abraham Lincoln did not want armed Black slaves (and you were taught in school that he wanted to free the slaves right?). He later gave in, but imagine the horrific torture that awaited a Black Union soldier that was captured by the Confederate army? The Black soldier did not receive equal pay for his fighting, and heroes like Robert Smalls proved that the Black soldier really was as smart as the White soldier, which was a common stereotype of the time as well as today (e.g. “IQ tests”). These Black soldiers would soon be placed back into second-class citizenship in the U.S., as the Union and Confederate states sought reconciliation with one another, not the men and women that it had enslaved for over 250 years. Those same Black soldiers, like other formerly enslaved Black Americans, didn’t receive their ”40 acres and a mule”. That land was given back to the very people they had just fought against just years prior.

Fast forward to WWI, right in the midst of the Nadir period for civil rights, as Black Americans were “free” but certainly not equal, so many Black men enlisted to fight, “the War Department had to stop accepting black volunteers because the quotas for African Americans were filled.” “African American men who owned their own farms and had families were often drafted before single white employees of large planters. Although comprising just ten percent of the entire United States population, blacks supplied thirteen percent of inductees.” They returned to a nation who’s cities erupted with race riots that stole black wealth (Tulsa, Oklahoma in 1921) and lynchings and sundown towns.

By WWII, Black Americans still enlisted and desired to fight so-call fascism with pride. However, how embarrassing was it for the USA to be called out on its hypocrisy by none other than…Hitler. He noted that the USA’s treatment of the Negro set an example for how Germany must deal with “foreign Jews”. They returned home after WWII still subjected to Jim Crow segregation, more race riots, and once again, unequal pay, as 1.2 million soldiers were not able to take advantage of their GI Bill and be free to move into the newly formed suburbs which would soon create an even wider wealth gap through housing that remains firmly entrenched into the 21^st century. The result, the Black soldier’s family could not benefit from sacrifice that he made for his country not just with housing, but because they were also unable to use the money for college tuitions or business loans. To add insult to atrocity, many were attacked by Whites as they were on their way home from the war.

How much changed by the Vietnam War for the Black soldier? I think you know the answer, as the 1960s are the one period of time most American’s did learn about in school as the “Civil Rights Era”, due to the assignation of Dr. Martin Luther King. Black Vietnam veterans, as after every other war, returned to segregated communities and “their place” in society. However, this time, the situation was in the process of changing. Some of these veterans returned home determined to now make this country live up to the promise it had been making to prior Black veterans for generations.

How will we look at the time of service for those who served in Desert Storm or the so-called Iraqi War and years of fighting the “War on Terror”? Fifty years from now, will we look back and note their time of service at the time when Black men and women were being shot and killed by police officers and the officers continuously get found “not guilty”? Will we see that they served at a time when “White Extremists” in their own country, are considered more dangerous than the terrorist they were fighting in the Middle East?

In my opinion, the Black veteran is the epitome of an American patriot. Perhaps they have never fought for what America actually was to them, but for what America always promised it would be to them and their offspring for their service.

For that, I sincerely say, thank you for your service.

Cool Pappa

Presentation Outline: The Evolution of Blackface

Published on March 26, 2019March 26, 2019 by Cool Pappa1 Comment

Lexi had the opportunity to present to her college class this week and decided to talk about the Evolution of Blackface. Perfect timing, as we had just watched Spike Lee’s Bamboozled a few weeks prior, but this was going to be a particularly “interesting” topic before a majority white classroom.

She has allowed me to repost her presentation outline (so it does not read like an essay) here on our site. Actually, that is the whole point that I’m teaching her, it is HER work! We write so many papers and do so much research for teachers or our employers, but it is our work, and something in us that we should share for our own purposes and not the benefit of others.

I must also say CONGRATULATIONS to my girl. In one month, she graduates with her Associate’s degree right after clocking the odometer over to her 18th birthday. Since she’s is going to be an English guru, hopefully she can edit dad’s sloppy grammar here on the site (and get him to write more) as well.

Topic: The Evolution of Blackface

Specific Purpose: To Inform my COM 206 class on the evaluation of blackface.

Central Idea: Everyone believes that blackface ended in the 1980’s, but there are still many examples of its presence online and in the news. From its racial beginning, controversial middle, and still foreseeable future.

INTRODUCTION

Attention-getter: Lisa R. Pruitt looked at her 1985 yearbook she edited when she was an undergraduate at the University of Arkansas. She was looking to see if any of the students appeared in blackface. After everything that has been starting to surface from other people’s college years, Pruitt believed she would find some photos depicting the same thing. After some searching, she was surprised to see that there weren’t any, but wouldn’t be surprised if she would have some.

Relevance to audience: The controversy about blackface has been spreading in the news lately, and this issue is one that is important to understand. Not only to judge future politicians and clothing, but to understand history as a whole.

Preview of speech: So, I will give a quick overview of how blackface came to be, what was happening with college students in the 80s, and how it’s being used in the 21^st century.

(Let’s first start with the quick history.)

BODY

The history of blackface is a very controversial and hidden history.
1. According to Eric Lott from the book Love & Theft: Blackface Minstrelsy and the American Working Class writes that the minstrel show is a, “transparently racial curiosity, a form of leisure that, in inventing and ridiculing the slow-witted but irrepressible ‘plantation darky’”.
  1. Eric Lott continues to say that this was a way of conveniently rationalizing the oppression of black people.
  2. Movies like The Birth of a Nation is an example of blackface. In which white people put on blackface and then made black people look savage and animal like.
2. The use of blackface dates back to minstrel shows in the mid-19^th century
  1. Minstrel shows were the biggest form of entertainment in America before TV shows and movies. These shows often depicted falsehoods about black people to make them seem idiotic and stupid.
3. After the 1980’s, blackface started to lose its value and instead was being ridiculed. Attitudes started to change about how African Americans are being depicted and whether or not it was right.

(Now that we know some history, let’s jump to the 80s. Where blackface flared until it died, our so we thought.)

For blackface, the 1980’s had many white college students taking part in the practice. This is referred to as the “Great College-Yearbook Reckoning”, stated by Zipporah Osei in “The ‘Great College-Yearbook Reckoning’: Scholars Say Blackface Images Aren’t Outliers”.
1. Lisa Pruitt also said, “that back then, she and her white classmates weren’t sensitized to the overt racism of blackface”.
2. This article continues to explain how politicians wore blackface to parties and events during their college years.
  1. Hafsa Quraishi for NPR writes, “both the (Virginia) governor and the attorney general admitted to instances of dressing in blackface for parties in the 1980s”.
  2. Zipporah Osei continues to say that, “Mark Herring, Virginia’s Democratic attorney general, admitted that he too had donned blackface in the 1980s”.

(Now after this time period of college rebellion, we enter the 21^st century. This is when we start to see another rise of blackface, but in a different form.)

There are still images of blackface being created today in the 21^st century. What’s to say that it will end any time soon.
1. The NPR article says that, “Back in 2000, when comedian Jimmy Kimmel was the host of The Man Show, he had a recurring skit in which he wore blackface to impersonate former Utah Jazz basketball player Karl Malone”.
  1. In this skit, he would mock Malone’s speech and intelligence while wearing full-body blackface.
    1. Jimmy Fallon also wore black face while portraying comedian Chris Rock in an episode of Saturday Night Live in 2000.
  2. This was being talked about so much that Spike Lee, a famous black director, made a movie called Bamboozled that was released in 2000.
    1. This movie touched on the reality of what would happen if minstrel shows were brought back today in the form of a television show. Not only did it talk about blackface, but it also touched on how black people can sell each the out.
  3. The Italian brand Gucci just got ridiculed for selling a black turtle necked sweater that included a red-lined cut out for costumers’ mouth.
    1. Other brands that had similar racist moments include Burberry with a hoodie that had a noose around it, and H&M with its ad controversy of a black boy wear a shirt that said, “coolest monkey in the jungle”.

CONCLUSION

Summary Statement: To conclude, blackface is still very much alive and well. Even though we think that no one uses blackface anymore; brands still release clothing that are blatantly racist. Famous comedians today also have put on blackface, yet they seem to be surprisingly quite during this blackface controversy toward the Virginia governor.

Audience Response Statement: Staying on top of this situation is important to understand how your century thinks. Will you still feel the same way you did when you shopped at Gucci before the sweater outrage, or will you know feel disgusted to own their products?

WOW Statement: We can’t get to a world of no racism, it is virtually impossible. But things as blatant as Gucci’s sweater can be resolved with a little common sense and understanding of history.

TTR Lesson of the Day: Analyzing Black TV Fathers

Published on May 16, 2018May 16, 2018 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

Today’s Lesson: Tuesday is Black TV Dad Tuesday. So today, the kids take notes comparing episodes of Good Times (James Evans), Bill Cosby Show (Heathcliff Huxtable) Fresh Prince of Bel Air (Uncle Phil), and Everybody Hates Chris (Julius). They are analyzing the role the Black father has inside the home. How is he portrayed? How is he different than Dre on Blackish (one of the few Black dads currently on TV)? What is his role in the family? Does he fit or promote stereotypes the dominant society has about Black men?

I will be sure to share what the young superstars come up with here!

Cool Pappa

My Experience In The Iron Temple

Published on March 28, 2018March 28, 2018 by Lexi1 Comment

A two and a half years ago I decided I wanted to workout with my Dad at the gym. Not because I liked to workout, but because I wanted bigger biceps and I wanted to lose some body fat. I would occasionally go to the gym with him, but he would work me so hard it didn’t make working out fun. When we moved out to Arizona, my family and I were writing our goals for the next year, and I decided I wanted to get in shape.

I have made great improvements since the first day I walked into the gym, which my Dad calls the Iron Temple. When I went to the gym the first day, I went in with specific goals, but after a year my goals changed and I focused more on my muscle growth then my body fat. I now like to flex my biceps and calfs to see the muscles pop out. My best improvement by far is the Leg Press, I have gone from 90 lbs to 360 lbs. The pain has now become tolerable, and sometimes I welcome it. My Dad has helped a lot in making me not quit because there are days where I just don’t feel like moving. Mayoclinic.org says that exercising can improve your mood, boosts energy, promotes better sleep, and if you join a group or go with friends can be fun and social. About two years ago my mom and I went to two group workouts with some friends. I liked one class and my mom liked the other so we were usually split. Most of the time in the middle of the class I would want to rest or quit but I felt an obligation to keep going and being the youngest in the class, I didn’t want the older people to see me give up. So being in a group can really help with your motivation.

When most people think of working out they think of a very painful and time-consuming activity, but it doesn’t have to be. If you like keeping track of your improvements then you can keep track of the amount of weight you use. If you like getting rewards you can set goals for yourself. Like everytime you workout you can have some chocolate milk or a piece of candy. Working out doesn’t have to be boring, just find ways to make it fun and comfortable for you.

-Lexi

A New Year And A Time To Overcome Old Struggles

Published on January 6, 2018 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

First I have to say, Happy New Year to you as we enter 2018. No way to not date a blog post as you can look right at the date of the post right?

After a long 2017, I’m very glad to at least have the opportunity for a new start. This year, I’m all about trying to get more content posted. One error I may have made in prior years was not posting in the midst of struggles as I want to help others through the hardships of homeschooling as well. Over the years, people have said, “It’s so easy for you all to do it, but for me…” and then the excuses start flowing. Well, let me tell you, it’s not so easy for us.

The 2017-2018 school year started with me taking over the role as the sole educator. My wife is focusing on building her career as a doula. Therefore, I started teaching my 13-year-old, 11-year-old and to a certain extent, my 16-year-old as well (much less work is required with her as she is in college full-time right now as well). This has been more challenging than I first anticipated for a number of reasons.

First, my “9 to 5” workload did not see the expected decrease. For over a year, I have been playing more of a significant role in our group after the loss of two veteran colleagues. That means more meetings (some useful, most not) and more responsibility to make sure money gets made and customers notice very little of our internal changes.

Second, my Big Homie and Boney have completely different learning styles (although I am hearing there is no such thing…more on that in a future post) from each other and different motivations than my oldest two. While this should be obvious, unlike society’s school, my job is to motivate, meet and lead them in their optimal learning sphere, not just from my learning sphere, a curriculum or other students sphere. Big Homie, once he focuses and if he’s engaged, is a tremendous problem solver. The struggle is to keep him focused. Of course, I’m so glad to be his teacher because if he were in society’s school, he’d likely be doped up on meds to make him “conform”, I mean…pay attention. Boney’s attention span is equally short as well, but she struggles with reading so more hands-on help is necessary for focus and explanation of lessons.

I’m going to be honest with all of you. I confess that there have been many nights I have felt like a failure.

As I have been focusing on work, other household challenges and my own health, there have been too many nights I have gone to bed feeling like I should have done more. I have been trying to at least get seven hours of sleep before starting my 6 A.M. workday in the home office, but that means I’ve gone to bed knowing I need to check work, but I’m exhausted and just don’t have much in me to push through.

I am a big goal person, so now this is one of my top priorities for 2018. I have a personal standard to do better because they deserve more and I know I can do much better. Don’t get me wrong, I think they have learned a ton over the last four months but I know we can do more and accomplish more.

So let me start this year by remembering one of my favorite Fredrick Douglas quotes,

“If there is no struggle there is no progress.“

I am standing on that quote right now. If you are homeschooling and struggling, or wondering if you can do this, I want you to stand on it as well. No, this is not easy financially; it takes time, resources, energy to bring it EVERY DAY. There are no days off in this game. But we focus on the payoff at the end of the race, knowing that the years will be gone before we know it. We will look back knowing we have left our footprints in the drying cement of their hearts and minds. My size 12s are there, flat-feet and all saying,

“You have been taught at an incredible price because you are a worthy investment. Live like one and carry our new tradition from generation to generation. A new family tree and legacy with minds filled by Dad.”

It is not easy, but thank God for the grace to keep striving to get it right and for seizing this new year he has given us.

TeachThemRight About Holidays, and Seven Lessons from My Father-In-Law You Can Use To Build A Wiser Family

Published on February 22, 2017February 22, 2017 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

Today it has been one year since my father-in-law (FIL) made his transition to eternity. My wife wanted to spend the day at the city zoo because that was one of the places he would meet her and the kids during the day for outings. I took the day off of work, gave the kids the day off of school (reason, 32,499 to homeschool), and dedicated this as a memorial day for his life, especially because it has been a year after his passing.

Make Your Own Family Holidays and Memorial Days

Monday, my main hustle gave us the day off to honor President’s Day. I decided to work and take today off instead. First, History.com describes Presidents day as, “Originally established in 1885 in recognition of President George Washington, it is still officially called “Washington’s Birthday” by the federal government. Traditionally celebrated on February 22—Washington’s actual day of birth—the holiday became popularly known as Presidents’ Day after it was moved as part of 1971’s Uniform Monday Holiday Act, an attempt to create more three-day weekends for the nation’s workers.” Personally, I’ve never been a fan of celebrating someone who would have me working on the plantation as a slave if they were alive today, and my family does not celebrate many of this nation’s holidays because they really are not for us. It is said that Mr. Washington “owned” over 300 “slaves” at the time of his death. After he died, I’m sure he had a good reason before the Creator of Man how he could own something that he did not create, and whether or not he treated them justly as human beings. Therefore, we ignored this day (notice that as with most “holidays” as well, honoring the person isn’t the primary reason, but monetary gain to the nation), and decided to give a day to someone who really meant something in our lives.

I would like to encourage all of the Furious Fathers to consider doing the same. First, consider some significant days in your life or the anniversary dates of impactful moments and people in your life. Maybe it’s the birth/death of your parents or friends that are no longer with us. Maybe it’s the anniversary of a significant family event or for some men, just taking their kid’s birthdays off would be a great start. Whatever you can find, I encourage you to give it a try. This is a great time for the family to come together in the evening for a meal, and reflect on why the day is special, handing down memories and lessons from the one honored or from an event, all with the intention of helping shape your family’s present and future.

Seven Lessons from My Father-In-Law

On that note, allow me to share with you seven lessons that I learned from my father-in-law, as I reflected on our relationship today.

If the Good Lord woke you up, it’s a good day – In the final years of his life, as I think he began to see that he did not have the energy and ability to do what he once did, I would ask my FIL how he was doing and his response was always, “The Good Lord woke me up this morning, so that makes it a good day.” How we love to “wake up on the wrong side of the bed” or immediately allow ourselves to get swept up in the cares of a day and thinking life is so miserable, never just being thankful that if our eyes opened, the day is good. That certainly doesn’t mean that we smile with joy when bad things happen or life does not seem to be waiting like a towel when we get out the morning shower to not dry us off, but add more water, the last thing we need. That just means that if you have the mental ability to know that it is another day (and not all people have this ability), it is off to a good start. This is truly a glass-half-full mindset. My FIL had an apartment in one of the more swanky cities in the area, known for being liberal, having a small downtown to party in, and trendy restaurants, but he lived on the 11^th floor and could see above the city’s tree line and would not move from that location. He had his view to see the sun come up in the east, and the ability to go sit on the corner and people watch, and he had seen that town change so much in all the years he lived and worked in the same area. He found contentment in the “little” things we often take for granted, the real treasures that make each day a good day.

You are never too old to change – When my FIL first heard about this so-called Black guy dating his daughter, he put down an edict that still has ramifications to this day. He said I was not allowed to come over to his house. I guess he felt superior as a hard-working so-called White man that the thought of his daughter being interested in someone Black after having her born and raised away from Black people, and the fact that this guy was working a dead-end job and already had a child, didn’t help as well. Needless-to-say, the latter two I’d have a problem with if my daughters were dating someone in the demographic. But over the years, I guess as he saw I was still in his daughter’s life after many years and was not afraid of him in any way, he seemed to change. Now this change wasn’t (at least outwardly) the usual go-along-to-get-along because my FIL never seemed much like that, but one that seemed genuine after his ideology was challenged and what seemed like some introspection on his part. Obviously, the fact that I am blogging about him right now says much, and after a few meetings, we quickly become quite close. I think he respected me and knew I respected him, even if we disagree with each other’s position on a topic, more we also discovered that we had so much in common and, as most father’s learned, his daughter may have married a man just like him despite being completely opposite in skin color. In the last decade of his life, my FIL and I grew pretty close, and at family events, we talked constantly. When he stopped attending those, I pretty much did as well! Our relationship was then built outside his immediate family, and sometimes he would call and we would talk for minutes (cause y’all know ole dudes don’t stay on the phone for hours) and when he came the kid’s games and over for holidays, we would talk more than he would talk to my wife…even about race! Perhaps it was having grandchildren. Perhaps it was God. I’m not sure what is was, but this guy seemed to do a complete 180 and it has taught me that some leopards do change their spots, even at an old age.
Attend Every Game – One reason our relationship strengthened so much was because of the amount of time we spent together. This was not a planned meet-up, but because he always wanted to be at my kids’ ball games to support them. He was at the baseball games and basketball games, even the dance recitals which no man wants to sit through! I can’t recall a time he left early or arrived late, he was just always there. During that time, I heard many stories, and I loved the sports stories the most, as he was alive to see Willie Mays (and my FIL was a serious baseball fan) and Ted Williams. When he said Ted Williams was his favorite player, but Willie Mays was the best player to play the game, that statement had weight to me. When he criticized today’s players and spoke of problems in the game, I knew it was with the knowledge that would match any ESPN analyst with Google right at their fingertips to do research. He would often tell me that he knew the starting line-up of the 1957 Detroit Tigers, but not what he did last week. A feeling I now know very well, as I can name the starting line-up of the 1983 California Angels but struggle to nearly everything else in my life as well. When he attended, he just wanted them to know he was there and he never criticized their game, just that they were playing hard. After every game, regardless of the outcome, they came over for their high-five and “good game!” I don’t think they will realize the effort it takes to have that kind of attendance record until they have to make the effort to go watch their kids and grandkids play, no matter you feel or “meaningless” the game.

opening-day-det-tigers-starting-line-up — Here’s the 1957 Detroit Tigers Opening Day Line-up! Source: Baseball-reference.com

Always Be Teaching and Learning – Whether it be a game, family gathering or phone conversation, my FIL was always learning something and teaching. Looking back, like many men of his generation that did not complete his high school education, he never made it to high school. So I think he made it a priority to always be learning something new to cover up any lack of knowledge people might perceive that he had when speaking to him. He seemed to know quite a bit about nearly anything and if he knew I was into a particular topic, we would see each other the next time and he had some info for me. He was always teaching some lesson or sharing how some event from the past will visit us again in the future. But he could be in this position because he was always learning. For his birthday, he loved to get a gift certificate to the bookstore. He gave me boxes and boxes of books that he picked up from the Salvation Army for $1.00 or less, and the topics consisted of sports, philosophy, religion, reference material and on and on. He seemed so proud that we were homeschooling the children and even more proud of what we were teaching them and the people they were becoming. No one on either side of my family was as much of a champion for my kid’s education than he was, and he was so optimistic at their future because they were out of the system.
“Live like no one else now so you can live like no one else later” – Dave Ramsey said it, but my FIL truly lived it. If you would have met my FIL and heard of his shopping habits, you’d think he was an elder man that was barely getting by. Quite the contrary. Where did he shop? The Salvation Army or any second-hand store that had deals. He’d bring bags over all the time with nothing but the free stuff he received from the drugstore with coupons. Some items had expired, some we still have, and some we gave away, but he viewed it as, “Hey, it’s free, so I figured someone could use it.” He drove around so long in a plain white rental-car-looking Ford Focus. He put approximately 2,000 miles a year on the odometer. Now, it wasn’t that he didn’t like or couldn’t afford a more flashy car, as he always wanted to have an Audi R8 and lamented often how he had to get rid of that ’67 Camaro with a stick because my wife’s baby seat was on the floor next to my MIL and he couldn’t drive it without hitting her seat. But he kept saying, “I cannot see paying that much money for a car I’d never drive. I can take the bus if I really need to go downtown, and the car I have takes me anywhere else I need to go just fine.” He loved to chat about the press cars I’d bring home and would give me car mags he bought from the store with good articles. But if it did not make fiscal AND practical sense, there was no purpose in him parting with his cash. So he kept that flip-phone till the end.
The last testosterone producing ride my FIL Owned…that had to go because of my wife!

When my FIL talked about the R8, you could hear the excitement

Being alone for a man is not something to fear but embrace – My in-laws divorced shortly after my FIL retired. Many men I know at my age cannot stand to be alone, let alone a man that had been married for three decades. But he seemed to take pride in being a bachelor, with his “pad”, frugal life, and discovering new dishes that he could make and eat in his crock pot. Sometimes as men, I think that we avoid and fear of being alone after many years of marriage, so we jump right back into another relationship for more security. However, I think he was an excellent example of how to be content with one’s own thoughts, failures, and dreams. Dr. Robert Glover of No More Mr. Nice Guy says that we as men need to know that no matter what, we will be okay and we can handle it. It is a lesson I’m still learning.

We all have to die someday – In a few weeks, it will also be one year marking the time my FIL and I were to meet again. I saw him in January of 2016 when visiting the old neighborhood and I honestly thought that due to the short notice, he would not meet with me. My FIL took each day as it came, so if he wasn’t in the mood to chat and chill, it’s a no go. Surprise visits were even worse, as he has always been an early to bed and early to rise guy. But turned out, not only did my short notice not matter, he really wanted to see me. It was like he knew it was the last time we would see each other. When kicked it in his place for quite a while and even though I knew the doctor’s opinion was that his months may be numbered, his spirit and zest said otherwise. When I asked him how he was doing, he said that, “You know, this is tough, but hey, we all have to die someday.” I then asked about his relationship with God and he said he was at peace with his Maker, knew where he was going and was ready to go. During his battle with cancer, knowing that we had to die someday seemed to make him appreciate just one more day so much more. He said, “That Good Lord has given me a lot of years and a great life, great kids, great grandkids, a job I enjoyed, you know, what do I have to complain about?” I left his place saying that I would be back in March when I had to return to speak at an event. He said to definitely come back by and see him, but I didn’t know if he would make that meeting myself. I left his presence with tears in my eyes and basically saying to him how much I appreciated all of the things you get to read about right now. As a man who admitted to making many mistakes in his life, and some that he paid the price for till the end, I wanted him to know that our finish after a horrendous start is something I will never forget and truly shows God’s grace to the two of us. Ever humbly accepted and agreed, and encouraged me to keep doing what I’m doing, because it’s my kids show that it is working. But I told him that he played a huge part of that as well, and it was one of the few times the old guy got speechless. I think we both parted ways unsure if that meeting, just less than two months away, would ever take place. I left having nothing unsaid to him, as who knows, I could have died instead. He at least seemed to be relieved at our honest exchange. All hearts were clear because we all have to die someday.

I don’t know.

Now I wonder, what DO I have to complain about?

That’s why we honor my FIL today and it’s good to think about the wisdom he passed down to me.

Other meaningless holidays come and go, but tomorrow, I’ll wake up thinking, “Thank you Good Lord for waking me up, and giving me a good day.”

Mom Arrested For Homeschooling Her Kids In Buffalo, NY

Published on February 21, 2017 by Cool PappaLeave a comment

Kiarre Harris was arrested not for a violent crime, embezzlement, or drinking and driving. No, she was arrested for homeschooling her children.

Now, homeschooling parents are aware that educating your kids is always a risk, and that is why many join the Homeschool Legal Defense Association, even if their state is considered “homeschool friendly”. It seems that if you are a member, the association will even publicize your case on their website and a check in the news area shows at least two other recent stories of families under fire in New York. I’m not sure what is going on, but it certainly seems like NY’s Child Protective Services is putting extra pressure on homeschooling families in 2017. That decision is probably made from a higher agency, but more on that in a moment.

If you watch the video below, you will have the opportunity to hear Kiarre Harris tell her own story. But allow me to expound on a few other points:

At first blush, this seems like the typical media trick (or should I say dog-whistle) being played when describing Harris in many news outlets. However, there is some relevance, as NY is said to be contesting her right to homeschool because she does not have full custody of the children.
If having full custody appointed by the court vital for homeschooling, why is it not a requirement for sending the child to public or private school? After all, a common area of contention with parents that do not live together is where the child should go to school. So, if there is fear that the parent does not have complete authorization to homeschool the child, shouldn’t the same standard apply for enrolling the child in any school, as there is no guarantee that the other parent agrees with that decision?
According to theblaze, “In addition, the district told WKBW that children are not to be taken out of school until individual education plans are approved.” Isn’t it amazing, that New York is considered a state that consistently votes Democrat over Republican, a party that prides itself on fighting for civil rights? This is why I do not get caught up in the politics game. Why does a “liberal” state that many flock to for the opportunity to express themselves, need to approve what you can teach your children? Many of us homeschool to teach our children true history, biblical values and to have a more focused overall education free of violence and the surrounding culture, so do you think they would approve of When We Ruled as a textbook in the curriculum? Do you think the POTUS will “tweet” about her case as an example of democratic hypocrisy and over-regulation?

Now that leads me to my final two points:

Kiarre Harris’s children were put into foster care. Unbelievable, and extremely sad for such an “infraction”. Much is said about the foster care system and whatever your view is, I am sure we all agree it is nowhere near the same as being with your parents in a loving home. A home so loving, she is choosing to stay at home with the kids 24/7! Is her “crime” worse than the possibility of her kids being harmed in a stranger’s home or even her in jail? And even if they are not harmed, how do you account for the confusion, fear, sadness, and anxiety of not knowing what is going to happen to them and why it is happening? Yet now, despite doing the “right thing”, the children are in the system. There is a file that has been created that will follow them at least until they are 18, and in the 21st century, likely much longer.
Kiarre Harris is officially “in the system”. While I do not know anything about her past, below she says that she has never been arrested and is not a criminal. Sadly, most so-called Black folks need to always give this disclaimer because if they have had police contact of any kind (this is why “stop and frisk” laws are so dangerous in case you don’t know), any injustice against them is now warranted as acceptable by the dominant society. But now, she has something that all law-abiding so-called Black people fear, a record. Again, it will follow her for the rest of her life as well, because she had the audacity to homeschool her children. On that note…
Kiarre Harris represents the quandary that proves why and the risk of so-called Black folks homeschooling their children, you BETTER have all yours t’s crossed and i’s dotted. Listen to me. If you are homeschooling in New York and have the finances to join the HSLDA, please do so! Forget that lawyer that our cousin used that we could call or just thinking nothing is going to happen, there are stories in your area showing that they are cracking down big time. When some groups catch a cold, we catch pneumonia, so a word to the wise is sufficient. That said, most so-called Black folks grow up in areas with subpar school systems and we cannot afford to send them to private schools, which are often subpar as well! Trust me, I went to one in the suburbs and there were numerous Detroit public schools that would have given me a better education and more advantages. But this generation, we no longer have to settle, we can bring them home, or at least do the main teaching at home! Just remember if you do, make sure you have extra layers of covering. It certainly appears Kiarre Harris had everything checked, but like we all know when that police car is in your rearview mirror, they can always get you on something.

Hear Kiarre tell her story below. Warning, language alert if your kids are around. While I’m not a fan of swearing, I ask that you do not be hypocritical in your assessment of her because of some of her foul language (I made the mistake of reading the comments section on some of the stories about her case…I normally know better and yes, they were as ugly as expected). After years of working in the corporate sector, I cannot hold her to a standard that those in the boardroom and on the golf course are not required to follow, not to mention, I’ve heard the bombs many drop in front of their children…